Then...something interesting happened...
I returned to my weblog to see that a visitor from Brooklyn, New York had dropped in. It may be coincidence, but I suspect he receives a message whenever I attempt to leave a comment. If Kalman really is monitoring me that closely, he may simply be curious...or something else.
During our extensive e-mail exchange where his Bullies2Buddies approach to my behavior catastrophically failed, he mentioned considering some sort of legal action to stop me. It's possible he's still considering a lawsuit, but that contradicts his most likely motive for preventing me from leaving comments. Legal action would draw attention to my weblog and if the media takes an interest it could backfire on him badly. Considering the huge number of Americans who've been badly damaged by bullies and their enablers, widespread publicity may not work in his favor.
Here's what I'd like readers to do. Leave a polite comment on Izzy Kalman's Psychology Today weblog. Don't be accusatory, insulting, or vulgar. Just ask him why I'm not allowed to post comments.
I like you Fowl Ideas and dislike Izzy, but despite the interesting storyline that paranoia could lead to thinking about how Mr. Kalman is stalking you, you should know that he did not visit you from Brooklyn. I am the Anonymous commenter from the previous post; I am from Brooklyn. I follow you and admire your dedication to stop sociopathic bullying and its endorsers such as Izzy but let us remain fair and not add extra negative descriptions than necessary because plenty exists to judge about Izzy without slandering him. I just wanted to clear things up; it was an understandable suspicion but not everybody from New York is Izzy or condones bullying. Maybe you can find some solution by not only having a way to track visitors' cities but also have a unique identifier for each viewer. I did not mean to embarrass you, just did not want you to be paranoid that every time I read your blog, for you to suspect Izzy is spying on you.
ReplyDeleteThank you for clearing that up.
DeleteIt was the timing that made me suspicious. It was only a few minutes between the time I attempted to leave a comment and the time stamp on your visit. And to make things more eerie, a telemarketing call came in from New York at about the same time. I didn't answer the call but I checked back in my caller I.D. and found the same number several times.
He doesn't want you confusing the suckers with logical arguments.
ReplyDeleteFollow the money. Very insightful.
DeleteI ordered his book, I'm about to read it myself. I'll let you know what I think.
ReplyDeleteAgain, I don't think Izzy's that bad. A bullied kid tricking bullies into liking him really isn't such a bad idea, it's just that it's the -only- angle he recognizes when it comes to bullying when the issues surrounding it are 3-d. Sometimes a good display of overwhelming violence/power by the bullying victim is necessary to create respect, that's just how violent animals are. (and children in the early stages of puberty are the worst for being violent, even if they transplant those feelings to words instead of actions)
There is nothing to learn from Izzy Kalman's writings. He is no expert on bullying or its prevention. He is an illegitimate psychologist who instead of helping victims tells them to roll over and die, to destroy their self worth, to accept a completely torturous life at the hands of a bully with not boundaries, Izzy engages in the worst possible torture, like many bullies that our society does not stop, sadly. There is no way you can read his work and find anything meaningful in it unless you are a moron but probably if you are supporting him, it is because you are a liar. Izzy Kalman is a pathological liar whose writings are not even consistent except for telling a bullying victim reading his books to lose all hope and accept torture and death. Izzy is the scum of scum, a demon in human form. When you see through his lies, you realize the true story behind that pathetic piece of shit. He has a beard and wrinkles but ultimately he is child or an adolescent, at best, where the only rule is: bullies win, victims lose. Izzy most likely identifies with bullies because he was labeled one and he can never see himself as wrong; Izzy is a self-centered sociopath that believes he can hurt anyone and everything is his for the taking and if someone stands up to him they are breaking the rules of the game he invented. His world works when targets exist for him to hurt, the targets must be completely subservient and totally passive, so that the coward and sadist Izzy can dominate and torture on impulse however he desires. Unfortunately, Izzy is only an individual in a world with lots of bullies similar to him and have created torture pits for defenseless targets while being a chameleon in society so that no law enforcement suspects him of being a sociopath, a perfect crime by Izzy.
DeleteIn spite of being the son of Holocaust survivors, he seems dangerously naïve about what people, especially adolescents are capable of.
Delete"In spite of being the son of Holocaust survivors, he seems dangerously naïve about what people, especially adolescents are capable of."
DeleteRight you are.
You, Anonymous, must be blind in the head to notice how bad Izzy is. For all I know, he could very well trick you into being the mindless follower of any bully or bullies.
DeleteAs for you, Anonymous #1, you totally correct in what you posted. Because of that, I choose you as my favorite person who posted in this blog.
I've read the first two pages and I have to say, my blood is starting to boil... already he's blaming Columbine NOT on the fucking jockocracy and Evan Todd and Hoffschneider and DeAngelis, but on the victims of bullying themselves. Eric and Dylan were just "too sensitive," then he starts whining how we should feel terrible for suspended bullies.
ReplyDeleteIt really sickens me. Much of what he says reeks of quakery and as someone driven to near-suicide by endless bullying, I find it offensive. His methods of tricking bullies are a useful tool, but the way he demonizes bullying victims who are the slightest bit offended at being told they are retarded, crazy faggots who need to commit suicide, and glorifies/defends the bullies is sickening.
Don't get me wrong, there's some good advice buried in there (I think? Only read 2 pages so far) but there's a lair of bullshit surrounding it that's so noxious it'll keep many people from getting to the good stuff.
I guess, it's kinda like a Smore only with shit instead of graham crackers. The stuff on the inside if good, but you gotta go through everything else to get to it.
You don't see this on the History Channel but the Nazi Party advised the German people to quit smoking, minimize their consumption of alcohol, eat a balanced diet, and to get enough sleep and exercise. Buried in amongst the ludicrous, hate filled propaganda there were nuggets of good advice. But the Nazi Party was still an organization whose power and authority were founded upon the willingness of the population to scapegoat the Jews for all of their problems.
DeleteThe Nazis initially built their public credibility upon the public's preexisting ant-Semitism. Kalman appears to have built his credibility upon the American public's preexisting hatred of the weak. This form of bigotry was described brilliantly by George C. Scott during his initial speech in the movie "Patton."
"Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser."
Fowl Ideas, please get this book and review it. It only takes 2 hours to read.
ReplyDeleteThe more I read it the more desperate I come to know what your synopsis of it would be.
It's funny you bring up the Nazis because the Nazis DID act bullies and the Jews DID shrug off a shit-ton of the abuses perpetuated against them. It didn't impress Hitler much.
I don't know if them acting differently would have turned 1930's Germany into the land of pro-Semitism, but lying on their backs and wagging their tongues like happy mutts did nothing to advance their goals. Ignoring an enemy's abuses and trying to kiss his ass does not always work.
Imo, I think Izzy developed Stockholm Syndrome from having been bullied. I say that with a straight face as someone who developed it as well, basically "falling in love" with the people that made me suicidal and imagining we were the best of buddies and that they really liked me.
In case (or rather when) Izzy reads this.... I don't hate the guy, or think his book is pure garbage, there IS some genuinely good advice in there. It can help people to a degree. But his putting all the impetus on the victims and his lionizing of the bullies as doing their victims a favor by "toughening them up", shows to me someone who was damaged by the abuse he went through. I don't hate Izzy, I respect his intentions and his teaching of trickery to get bullies to like their victims, but that isn't a "fowl-proof method" (pun intended) with 100% success.
A psychopath who pours baby oil on the floor, throws a kid down it, squirts ketchup at him and screams that he's a faggot that needs to be burned alive in an oven is NOT a "misunderstood" nice guy and the victim is NOT the sole reason for his abuse
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/national/daily/june99/columbine12.htm.
I'm aware of the Washington Post's brave, initial effort to expose Columbine for what it was. Since then most media outlets have lapdogged the Trench Reynolds view of things.
DeleteI'll need the title of the book.
You may be right about most of the things in your post, Anonymous. But you know? Izzy's advice is complete baloney. All it does is encourage others to be mindless drones of bullies And if you think he isn't so bad, then you trying following his methods. In the end though, you'd regret doing that.
DeleteHowever, you're better off following the methods of a guy whose name is Ben Leichtling. I think that you'd respect and like him more since he's against bullying and Izzy's methods. Heck, his advice is much better than Kalman's.
If you wish to contact Ben, you can do that at this website of his:
http://www.bulliesbegone.com/
http://www.amazon.com/Bullies-Buddies-Turn-Enemies-Friends/dp/0970648219/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1384797385&sr=8-1&keywords=bullies+to+buddies
ReplyDeleteThat book is total BS, which is also what it's author is full of. If I didn't know better, I'd say that you've been brainwashed by him.
DeleteAnd just so you know you know that I agree with everything that the Anonymosu who posted in this blog at 5:50 PM posted and disagree with everthing that the Anonymous who posted commented here at 1:42 PM posted.
That book is total BS, which is what its author is full of. If I'm you, I wouldn't put that website in this blog, which is against Izzy.
Deletehttp://www.amazon.com/review/R3L64FP089KUPP/ref=cm_cr_pr_viewpnt#R3L64FP089KUPP
ReplyDeleteBest review for his book, though, I'd give it 2 stars instead.
Whoever posted that review is mostly correct. But as a review for that book, I'd give it zero stars due to my dislike for bullies and Izzy.
DeleteAlso, didn't you prove the fallibility of Izzy's methods when he was unable to win you over? Not everybody will get along with everybody, and kissing somebody's ass in just the right way won't always earn you more allies like you're on Game of Thrones.
ReplyDeleteYou're so rihgt in that sentence.
DeleteI spent a fair amount of time in the company of sociopaths when I was young and I read about them as I got older. I'm intimately familiar with their patterns. Kalman attempted to be buddies and it obviously didn't work. The only thing missing was physical presence. I wasn't hovering over him, accidently knocking things out of his hands, spilling food on him, or damaging his belongings.
DeleteKalman is clueless about the behavior of bullies as are his equally clueless customers.
I couldn't agree with you more, FI (Fowl Ideas).
DeleteI'll ask him, but he sounds a bit confused about reality, and he probably won't want to admit that posting a comment in disagreement with his theories scares him.
ReplyDeleteMy criticism may be costing him customers...
DeleteOf course, criticizing a snake oil salesman may cost customers as well.
"My criticism may be costing him customers..."
DeleteGood. It serves him right for tryin' to brainwash victims. And I hope that you criticize him some more.
Have you gotten the book yet, Fowl Ideas? I'm REALLY anxious to see your review of it, and hope you can put it up on Amazon.com!
ReplyDeleteI haven't ordered it yet. Been kinda busy.
DeleteSome of the stuff in there is pure gold.... trust me, you'll like it.
ReplyDeleteAlso, do you still have your old Izzy interview and other stuff around? I think you said you deleted some of it, but later you changed your mind on Izzy again so I was hoping it'd be back somewhere.
I still have all of our e-mails. I wasn't planning on publishing them. They simply illustrate how his bullies2buddies technique is a failure.
DeleteYou lie like a dog, Anonymous. Can you not tell how useless and deluded Izzy's ways of dealing with bullies are? In case you haven't noticed, Kalman doesn't seem to care about victims. Instead, he'd rather make them continue to be the victims of those antagonists for the rest of his life.
DeleteAnd since when did Fowl Ideas go back to liking Izzy? he doesn't do that. I once asked him (Fowl Ideas) if he's back to being supportive of Kalman and he told me that he's anything but supportive of him.
And don't assume that Fowl Ideas will like some of the stuff that Izzy wrote. All of it is nonsense. But if you'd rather be brainwashed by that moronic Kalman, be my guest. Just don't blame me if you suffer the consequences for it.
As for you, Fowl Ideas, you're totally right about Izzy's books illustrating how his bullies2buddies technique's a failure.